It's fucked up. Whoa! You think I would let my kids near you? Smartest of the bunch was Nicky Koskoff. Captain Ted Beecham: Captain Ted Beecham: Naomi Lapaglia: Danger at every turn. [narration] The 4.95-acre equestrian estate comes with a wine cellar, a ten-stall stable, and a saltwater pool. What do you mean happy for me? It had nothing to fucking do with me! lastly it's down to the humour. Jesus Christ. Jordan Belfort: What? I'm fucked up, Brad. Martin Scorsese 's The Wolf of Wall Street is a darkly comedic portrayal of unrestrained Wall Street hedonism and greed that ranks among the maestro's greatest works of the last decade. You dress like shit, so fuck you! Hey, listen, I quit! Naomi Lapaglia: Fun coupons! Yeah, my wife yeah, my wife is my cousin or whatever. You have to excuse my friend. Fuck. Cinemark It's like lasers. Jordan Belfort: the success of scorsese's wolf of wall street is that it's enjoyable to watch and it shouldnt be. You were, like, screaming at people. The name of the game, moving the money from the client's pocket to your pocket. Wake up, you piece of shit! Come on, baby. Jordan Belfort: Sea Otter, who sold meat and weed. Cunt, cock, asshole." Brad: This is what happens when you fuck with your pets on new issue day! All you have to do today is pick up that phone and speak the words that I have taught you. Donnie. You can give generously to the church or political party of your choice. No? Mmm, baby. ~ Jordan Belfort. This 10-digit number is your confirmation number. All very acidic above-the-shoulders mustard shit. It was obscene, in the normal world. I don't even know. 40 Alfred Adler Quotes That Will Make You Reflect. I'm not like, gonna let someone else fuck my cousin, you know? It's a woozie. I'm still hard. Once we sucker them in, we unload the dog shit. Robbie Feinberg ('Pinhead'): I heard some stupid shit. Is she like a first cousin, or is she Donnie Azoff: Some little hooker you were fucking last night? Jordan Belfort: Robbie Feinberg ('Pinhead'): I finished my paperwork and I was, just had a couple minutes. A real wolf pit, which is exactly how I liked it. There were two guys over there on the table. Oh, no. Put the fucking car in the park, you dumb fucking idiot! The fucking hero I'm gonna be back at the office when the Bureau seizes this fucking boat. A master diver! They usually cost a hundred dollars or less, and if you didnt wear a condom, youd get a penicillin shot the next day and then pray that your dick didnt fall off. Without you, they're just worthless hunks of plastic. You be telephone fucking terrorists! The Cerebral Palsy phase. They're fuckin' - the things they're doing now, Pops, I mean, I mean, it's on a whole other level. Terms and Policies Get the ludes downstairs! Theyre called telephones. People have been buzzing about Martin Scorsese's new movie, "The Wolf of . Jordan Belfort: Oh, my God! I've done a lot of bad shit, I'm going to hell! Stratton Oakmont. I am a master diver, you hear that? Dont worry, it wont take long. Naomi Lapaglia: Go to a trading floor on Wall Street. Jordan Belfort, OK, first rule of Wall Street Nobody and I dont care if youre Warren Buffet or Jimmy Buffet nobody knows if a stocks going up, down or f-ing sideways, least of all stockbrokers. Jordan Belfort: Now, right now, John, the stock trades over-the-counter at 10 cents a share. [stands up tall, smiling] You're not taking my kids, sweetheart. Jordan Belfort: You wanna fuck me, Jordan? Okay? Like a loaded M16 without a trained marine to pull the trigger. I do it 'cause I fucking *need* to. Most of the quotes by Jordan Belfort are very inspiring and Ive even included some funny quotes from the movie. Really, really great. You cleaning your fishbowl? Naomi Lapaglia: His eyes seem to be a little bit odd, don't they? Wed love your help. Give me a kiss, sweetheart. Give yourself no choice but to succeed. Of course, after the bachelor party, me, the Duke, needed a few penicillin shots so he could safely consummate the marriage. Come on. Okay, mommy likes to play games with daddy. Baby, you know you got real anger issues. Guinea Gulch. Once in the morning, right after I work out, then once right after lunch. A Long Island mansion featured in Martin Scorsese's 2013 film "Wolf of Wall Street" is listed for $10 million. Well isn't that just fucking convenient for you! We require immediate assistance! Trust me, okay? Is it Wednesday already? it's partly due to dicaprio. My name is Jordan Belfort. No, I'm not fucking letting you near my kids! No it's not like that. Read critic reviews. Is it, is it mayhem? I have been a rich man and I have been a poor man. [when asked who is Captain Ahab] Patrick Denham: Your Ticket Confirmation # is located under the header in your email that reads "Your Ticket Reservation Details". Let me lock in that trade right now and get back to you with my secretary with an exact confirmation. Jordy, one of these days the chickens are gonna come home to roost. Donnie Azoff: Naomi Lapaglia: One fucking day, you couldn't keep it together? What I want to know is, have you got the guts to live? Jordan Belfort, You dont choose who you fall in love with, do you? Coming Soon. I can't untie you! So I used the cousin thing, as like, an in with her. Say hi to Rocco and Rocco! Robbie Feinberg ('Pinhead'): You look like a kid, and Wall Streets no place for kids. And act as if you are already a tremendous success, and as sure as I stand here today - you will become successful., You dont choose who you fall in love with, do you? You gotta feed the geese to keep the blood flowing. Ti mun bt tay vi vn ca bn bng cch tr nn giu c. You had to deal with the gold course people, too! What a greek tragedy! Jordan Belfort: It's like playing a game of chess with your own life. Mayday! Jordan Belfort: You're dealing with numbers. While he runs his activity with rather questionable methods, he lives a stormy relationship . Jordan Belfort: Jordan Belfort: Im gonna let you in on a little secret about these telephones. The nice thing about being rescued by Italians is that they feed you, make you drink red wine, then you get to dance. You know what? ~ Teresa Petrillo. I started this website because I wanted to help people like you to maximize their potential and achieve their dreams. And then once right after lunch. Max Belfort: The easiest way to make money is - create something of such value that . [Naomi slaps Jordan and he slaps her back]. [voice over] Maybe sell the house. Donnie Azoff: Didn't take long for people to start abusing ludes, of course, and in 1982 the U.S. government "Schedule 1'd" them, along with the rest of the world. Look at this! And all my friends are trying to fuck her, you know, and I'm not gonna let one of these assholes fuck my cousin. I don't love you anymore, Jordan! There were certain things that you just didnt joke about; it was simply bad luck. Yeah. Explains you. I dont care whose birthday it is. Donnie Azoff, Its business. is an initial public offering. They were everywhere! All right, get the fuck off my boat. Eventually Ben married her, which was pretty amazing, considering she blew every single guy in the office. People tend to give up. Jordan Belfort: I'm sure every person has this; it's just that my monologue is particularly loud. In London. We grew up together, and she grew up hot, you know. it should simply be a lesson learned about the world of the stock broker because it's not possible to empathise with his character as everything he does it so vile. My fucking warriors, who will not hang up the phone until their client either buys *or fucking dies!*. I can't close this briefcase. Look! Write your name down on that napkin for me. Why? Absolutely fucking not. Absolutely not but we were making more money then we knew what to do with. Jordan Belfort, There is no such thing as bad publicity. Oh my God! Yeah. Jordan Belfort: Go on. I will not die sober! Jordan Belfort: I want to. It'll keep you sharp between the ears. If youre into films about money, sales, success and that rags to riches story then it is all of that with a bunch of crazy, obscene and extreme all thrown in. Bo Dietl: fucking digits. In 2013 it was adapted into a movie by the same name. That's right, I forgot. Just a moment while we sign you in to your Goodreads account. She's already got C-cups, but now she wants FUCKIN' DOUBLE D'S! Hey, sweetheart! They're bald - they're bald from the eyebrows down. In the bedroom? Sweetheart, you should be happy for the both of us. Get off. Mark Hanna: There is no such thing as bad publicity. Some stuff about running drugs with Rocky Aoki, you know, the founder of Benihana? If you sell $10,000 worth of this stock, I will personally give you a blowjob for free. Okay, let's do it. Even though I own 85% of Steve Cocksucking Motherfucking Madden Shoes, the shares were in his fucking name! Naomi Lapaglia: The reason for the call today, John, is something just came across my desk, John. No one's gonna fucking die! Jordan Belfort: And today, you needed to clean your fishbowl, today? Funny, self-referential, and irreverent to a fault. Chantalle: [Pretends to walk away, but suddenly turns back]. Jordan Belfort: Brad: Jordan Belfort: Let me get that right. No, Daddy doesn't even get to touch Mommy for a very, very very long time. It's wonderful. Cocaine and hookers, my friend. The Wolf of Wall Street: Directed by Martin Scorsese. But thats not because youre a failure. What do you mean you want a divorce? My fucking warriors, who will not hang up the phone till their client either buys. [Approaches the guy] Jordan Belfort: Tell me. Do it differently each time. Why didn't you tell me, sweetheart? You know, just people say shit. Sell me this pen! I'm sure we'll be seeing each other real soon. Holy fuck, you did just say that. [bursting into laughter] Jordan Belfort: You know those guys who got like the beard with, like, no mustache or some bullshit? Error rating book. Except for that one time. Wouldn't you like to learn how to sell it? Oh yeah. Jordan Belfort: Robbie Feinberg, the Pinhead, took five years to finish high school. Jordan Belfort: The captain tied you up, he almost fuckin' tasered you! Jordan Belfort, the former stock broker whose story inspired the hit movie The Wolf of Wall Street, is suing the filmmakers for $300m (229m). Jordan Belfort: What a fucking burden, and actually had to do some work besides swiping my fucking credit card all day? I'm pretty fucking sure. She you know, her her father is the is the brother of my mom. Please reference Error Code 2121 when contacting customer service. It kind of wigs some people out. The show goes on! Shut the fuck up! Jordan Belfort: FBI! Rogue wave! Pick up the phone and start dialing! Sides? You don't think I'm gonna see my fucking kids again, huh? Because sometime in the not-so-distant future, you're gonna be pulling up at a red light, in your beat-up old fucking Pinto, and that person's gonna be pulling up right alongside you in their brand new Porsche. Naomi Lapaglia: Whether America plans to invade Switzerland in the upcoming months. Three or four times, maybe five. Trained professionals to guide you through the financial wilderness. You hear me? I want you to deal with your problems by becoming rich! Jordan Belfort, I want you to deal with your problems by becoming rich! Jordan Belfort, If anyone over here thinks Im superficial or materialistic, go get a job at McDonalds because thats where you belong. Jordan Belfort, But before you depart this room full of winners, I want you to take a good look at the person next to you. Naomi Lapaglia: But there's a big chance, right? Copyright Fandango. [Naomi walks in on a gay orgy] Jordan Belfort: And I hate fucking chess!, And my wifewell, I guess shed earned her scene with me, but still; did she really have that much reason to be angry? Donnie Azoff: But before you depart this room full of winners, I want you to take a good look at the person next to you. Yeah, no. Patrick Denham: They were usually struggling young models or exceptionally beautiful college girls in desperate need of tuition or designer clothing, and for a few thousand dollars they would do almost anything imaginable, either to you or to each other. Are you fucking serious? Saturday Night Fever territory. Oh, my God. You're gonna knock whose fucking teeth in? This movie unfortunately is too raunchy to ever be considered for an award, but it is a quality film. Because sometime in the not-so-distant future, youre gonna be pulling up at a red light, in your beat-up old fucking Pinto, and that persons gonna be pulling up right alongside you in their brand new Porsche. The movie is being directed by Martin Scorsese, stars Leonardo DiCaprio, and is based on the autobiography of Wall Street castaway, Jordan Belfort. Donnie! I'm sure. Jordan Belfort: Mommy, have you ever noticed anything odd about Mr. Because I can't keep track of your professions, honey. It's the first time a stock is offered for sale to the general population. And you wanna know what I was just thinking too? I love you, baby. I got a couple of mil' comin' in like a week. I don't understand. there's some very awkward but funny, laugh out loud, moments that i'm still thinking about and laughing to myself over long after viewing. Jordan Belfort: Jordan Belfort: Why would You be so cruel as to use the king of Japanese restaurants to take me down? I put the money on that fucking table, not you! Donnie Azoff: [gets a wire] I have been a rich man and I have been a poor man. The movie is popular for its engaging story and its depiction of the notorious party culture. Do I jerk off? Gentlemen, welcome to Stratton Oakmont. I can't go down there, Jordan. Jordan Belfort: Jordan Belfort: Mr. Hanna, you're able to do drugs during the day and then still function, still do your job? Naomi Lapaglia: Turns out you're completely off the hook, honey. We don't start dialing at 9:30, because our clients are already answering the phone! Mark Hanna: They all want something for nothing. Jordan Belfort, Still, give them to me young, hungry, and stupid. Donnie and I were investing in a condominium complex in Venice. Jordan Belfort: Donnie Azoff: Captain Ted Beecham: OK. If you agree to the divorce right now, I will allow visitation. Yes, I think it's true. And the first thing we needed was brokers. Pick up the phone and start dialing! There is no nobility in poverty. I mean, we had similar interests and shit. Get off me! The year I turned 26, as the head of my own brokerage firm, I made $49 million, which really pissed me off because it was three shy of a million a week. You're a lying piece of shit! By continuing, you agree to the Privacy Policy and You're in the fucking minor leagues. How are you doing today? Once in the morning after I work out, once after lunch. Max Belfort: Jordan Belfort: It's fairy dust. I was born too - too early. Jordan Belfort: Or fucking dies! Jordan Belfort, So you listen to me and you listen well. When you get really good at it, you'll fucking be stroking and you'll be thinking about money. Jordan Belfort: Funny, self-referential, and irreverent to a fault, The Wolf of Wall Street finds Martin Scorsese and Leonardo DiCaprio at their most infectiously dynamic. It doesn't even Donnie Azoff: I fucking hate you, Jordan! Mark Hanna: Jordan Belfort: You know what I mean? I'm talking about normal people, working-class everyday people. "Fuck this, shit that. You know? Naomi Lapaglia: Once he was an ice cream vendor and now Jordan is the head of a stockbroker office: he's greedy, he loves power and all forms of excess. Is she like, a first cousin? You could pay off your mortgage. Act as if you're a wealthy man, rich already, and then you'll surely become rich. Nobody - and I don't care if you're Warren Buffet or if you're Jimmy Buffet - nobody knows if a stock is going to go up, down, sideways or in circles. Jordan Belfort: [throwing money at the FBI agents] Jordan Belfort: Donnie Azoff: picks her up. Jordan Belfort: You know? Jordan Belfort: S-so if I, if I sell a stock at $10,000, my commission is 5,000 bucks. Say hi, mommy! They're business expenses. Pick up the phone and start dialing! They don't give a shit about money. Number one rule of Wall Street. Pride. Your profit on a mere $6,000 investment could be upwards of $60,000! Jordan Belfort: This is a fucking mayday! They all want something for nothing. Can't imagine ever not enjoying getting fucked up. And by the way, John, our analysts indicate it could go a heck of a lot higher than that. Mommy is just so sick and tired of wearing panties. Naomi Lapaglia: But no touching. It'll also help your fingers dial faster. You snooks will now be targeting the wealthiest 1% of Americans. Jordan Belfort: Jordan Belfort: The real question is this: was all this legal? Act as if you have unmatched confidence and then people will surely have confidence in you. Jordan Belfort, Successful people are 100% convinced that they are masters of their own destiny, theyre not creatures of circumstance, they create circumstance, if the circumstances around them suck they change them. Jordan Belfort, I want you to back yourself into a corner. Good for you, little man. I told you, you're not taking my fucking kids. [also in thoughts] That'd be 40,000 shares, John.
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